Notice:Editorial team review only - scholar review pending
I have been away from Allah for years. Is it too late to come back?
No - as long as the soul has not left the body, the door is open. Allah revealed: 'We have already created man and know what his soul whispers to him, and We are closer to him than his jugular vein' (Qur'an 50:16) - the distance you feel is a feeling, not Allah's actual position. The Sunnah teaches Allah's joy at the returning servant is greater than the joy of one who finds his lost camel in a barren land. Begin with Sayyid al-Istighfar (Sahih al-Bukhari 6306), which contains the very confession of a returning believer: 'I acknowledge Your favours upon me and I acknowledge my sins; forgive me, for none forgives sins except You.' Recite, then perform two rak'ah, then continue. The door is open.
Do I have to make up all the prayers I missed?
The classical scholarly difference: one position (majority of the four madhhabs) holds that intentionally-missed salah must be made up; another position (Ibn Taymiyyah, Ibn Hazm) holds that intentionally-missed salah cannot be 'made up' because its time has passed - what remains is sincere repentance, return to faithful daily salah, and abundant voluntary worship as compensation. The Prophet, peace be upon him, emphasised that deeds are by intentions (Sahih al-Bukhari 1) - return now, intend faithfully, and consult a qualified local scholar on whether and how to make up specific prayers in your case. Do not let the question of qada paralyse your return; begin the next salah on time.
What if I return to Allah and then fall back into old habits?
Return again. The Prophet, peace be upon him, taught that Allah's mercy precedes His wrath, and that the believer who repents repeatedly is loved, not despised. Sayyid al-Istighfar (Sahih al-Bukhari 6306) was given for the believer who keeps stumbling - the very wording 'I acknowledge my sins' assumes the sinning continues to happen. Each return is a fresh start; each return is recorded; no return is wasted. The cycle of return-fall-return is the human condition; what determines the believer is the direction of the next step, not the absence of falls. Allah revealed: 'Those who believed and did not mix their belief with injustice [shirk] - those will have security, and they are guided' (Qur'an 6:82). Stay in the direction of belief.
?What should I do first - learn Islamic jurisprudence (fiqh), recite Qur'an, or just pray?
Start the five daily prayers tonight at the next prayer time. The salah is the spine of the religion; everything else stabilises around it. Once the salah is in place for two weeks, begin learning the basic fiqh of purification and salah from a trusted Sunni source. Add Qur'an recitation - even one page a day - as your steadiness grows. Do not wait until you 'feel ready'; the salah itself is what produces the readiness.
?My friends are still in the old life. Do I have to leave them?
Distance, not necessarily severance. The believer needs companionship that supports the daily salah and adhkar, not undermines them. Begin building one or two new Muslim friendships that pull you upward, and remain civil with old friendships without joining them in what undermines your salah. Sometimes time and your steadiness invite them; sometimes the distance becomes permanent because their direction is incompatible. Trust the process; do not force a confrontation, and do not pretend the old habits did not affect you.